What if…

Big Spender (Fosse Original Broadway Cast Recording) Click to listen to the song.

When I startled myself awake this morning, my alarm clock’s red glow said 6:49.  Bleh, its so early, I think to myself.  I have a few hours more that I can sleep.  I close my eyes, and that’s when the thoughts come flooding into my head.  What if I forget everything?  What if the dancers hate the concept?  What if the director or producer hate it?  What if I forget to bring all of my notes?


I can’t turn my brain off.  I try meditative breathing and focusing on the hum of the sounds outside.  I try to focus on one little dot on my ceiling.  Nothing helps, and I can’t get back to sleep.  I don’t want to get out of bed, because it’s freakin’ cold out there!  I know that’s supposed to be the best thing to do, but I just couldn’t tear myself away from the warmth and cuddliness of my bed.  Then, finally at around 8:00, the sleep returns.  It’s short-lived because when the alarm actually goes off at 8:50, I am more tired than if I were just to have gotten out of bed when I first opened my eyes. But the first dance rehearsal is today at 10:00 so I gotta start my day.

I finish my daily ablutions, grab a banana, my script, my notes, my video camera, and my keys, and head out the door.  It was a little drizzly, but ten minutes after arriving at the rehearsal hall, the sun was shining as if to say, this is going to be a great day.

The dancers are trickling in as we are warming up and I am explaining my concept. I can’t say exactly what that is just yet, but once the show opens, I will be happy to let you all know.  However, I will say that it is not your typical version of Big Spender.  Nowhere near typical. I have to admit that I was worried about how the women would take this news, but when I told them how we would start the number, there was a collective gasp, followed by excited chatter.  Big smiles from me as you can imagine!

We got everyone into place, and began learning the number, there was a lot of giggling at the awkwardness of it all, but in the end, I have a number that I am very excited to share with the audience!  The women look great, and they said that it was an incredibly fun number to do.  I think that sometimes, I am too much of a self critic.  Some of the ladies, knew that I was nervous because it’s a taste of what’s to come, and if they didn’t like this number, how would they feel about the rest.  After rehearsal, they said, “You were nervous for no reason.  This is a great number!”

I am lucky to have such a great group of people to work with.  They are honest and if it was bad, they’d have no problem saying so. As would the co-producer.  But he was “very impressed.”

Tomorrow, it’s parts 1 and 2 of Rich Man’s Frug.  Oh, you better believe that we are performing all three parts.   I can’t wait!!!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s