Baby, Baby, I got the feelin’…

James Brown’s music has always made me want to dance.  It’s infused with this energy that just fills every cell in me and either I have to sing or dance.  But I gotta do SOMETHING!

Similar to the energy of the late, great James Brown’s music, is that of the cast of How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, hereafter to be referred to as H2$, okay?  That title is just too long to keep typing.

There is a lot of talent in this cast, and I for one am very lucky to be a part of it.  Everyone is nice and has a sense of humor.  I haven’t come across anyone that isn’t having fun.  Our J. Pierrepont Finch, played by the mischievous John Eubank is a perfect blend of smarmy and charming.  They make me want to dance and sing too!  If there were enough people, I would say that my character definitely wouldn’t dance.

So as I am building my character and looking through the script, I find that I want to create a super ridiculous backstory for Bert Bratt.  I have a ton of ideas, and I am always reading about playing the stakes at the highest point you can, but I am beginning to wonder to myself if they are too over the top.  I’m sure if they are, our director will say I need to chill.

The look of the character is a whole other beast that is developing.  I am trying to figure out how to get the “look” that the staff of the show are going with, but my idea is a bit extreme when it comes to the hair.  The producer wants this:

Which I love, but my hair doesn’t do that.  It just physically doesn’t do it.  Also, no gel that I have ever found has the cement hold I would need to maintain a well groomed look after dancing what our choreographer says will be our deaths.  I believe her words were: “You are gonna die.”   So in order to get that tight to the scalp look on the sides like the picture above, I offered this:

The sides and back are shaved very close to the scalp.  Now, I know that the shaved look isn’t appropriate, but after a week or so, the hair will fill in and be dark enough so that you can’t tell that it’s shaved until you are close up.  Sadly, my producer swears that he can get my hair to work, even though I know after YEARS of trying to do it, I can’t.  But, he’s shut that idea down.

I know the stylist on Mad Men uses American Crew products, but I’ve tried that and there is no way that it’ll hold after a single dance step.  Let’s see Garnier is out.  Bed Head holds well, but once you start sweating, there’s trouble.  D:Fi is good but once you break the style by taking off a hat, for example, you have to reapply to readjust the misplaced hair.   Short Sexy Hair is great for creating a spiky look, but it flakes and breaks easily.  LA Looks, yeah, I am going WAAAYYYY back.  No strong enough at all.  Do they even still make that stuff?  My sister once got my hair to stay for about 20 minutes. Once.  She used her LA Looks gel, some mousse from a white can and a ton of Aqua Net.  20 minutes for all of that.  Sad days my friends, sad days.

I am toying with the idea of glasses as well.  Since I have to be clean shaven, I will look all of 20 or so.   How does a 20 something become the head of the Personnel department of a giant corporation that quickly?  Hopefully, I can find some mature looking ones that help and not hurt my case.

Have you found a gel that can withstand a hurricane?  Please let me know, cuz I’ve tried a ton of stuff to no avail, as you can see.  Suggestions are highly encouraged.  Does your hair not do what you tell it to?  Let’s share stories. Leave a comment below.

Have a great day!!